Health & Wellness

20 Signs You Are In An Abusive Relationship: By Angel Ojukwu.

I am a woman and I have sisters and friends that I love, I would never want them to be in an abusive relationship. But just to remind you, men can also be abused as well, so don’t just think it only happens to women. Most times men keep quiet… SAD ☹. Everyone has arguments, and everyone disagrees with their partners, family members and others close to them from time to time.

But if this begins to form a consistent pattern and you feel afraid of your partner, then this is a sign of abuse and domestic violence. You may feel like you have no power over your life and that you are being controlled by your partner.

Abusive Relationship

I have listed some warning signs below to help you make sense of your situation. Anyone of the following signs is serious. You do not need to experience several, or all of them for your relationship to be abusive.

  1. You are afraid of your partner when s/he speaks you jump.
  2. You are constantly ‘walking on eggshells’ because of his/her mood swings.
  3. You spend your time working out what kind of mood he is in and the focus is always on his needs.
  4. He/she loses temper easily and over minor things.
  5. He has hit you or almost hit you and/or your children.
  6. Your partner has been abusive in a previous relationship.
  7. He criticises your family and friends and/or makes it difficult for you to see them or talk to them on your own.
  8. He calls you names and threatens you and/or your children.
  9. He is jealous and accuses you of flirting and having affairs.
  10. He regularly criticises you in front of other people – including about the way you look, dress, and/or your abilities as a mother.
  11. Your needs are not considered important or are ignored, and he makes the decisions in the relationship.
  12. You find it hard to get time on your own. When you do spend time away from him, he demands to know where you were and who you were with.
  13. He controls your access to basic essentials such as the car, the family finances, food, the telephone and internet.
  14. He has forced you to do something that you really did not want to do.
  15. He has forced you to have sex with him or with other people. He has made you participate in sexual activities that you were uncomfortable with.
  16. He tries to control aspects of your life such as whether you work, and where; who you see and when; what you can spend; what you can wear; what you watch or listen to on the radio or television.
  17. He demands to know the passwords to your email account and social networking pages.
  18. He has threatened to kill you or to kill himself if you leave him.
  19. He interrogates you intensely about who you talked to and where you were, checks the mileage on the car, keeps all the money or asks for receipts, and insists you ask for permission to go anywhere or do anything.
  20. He has a highly unrealistic expectation. He expects perfection from you and for you to meet his every need

If after reading this you think that you are, or might be, living in an abusive relationship please seek for help. Contact the police.


The author OMAMODA

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